Welcome to That’s Philosophical, a newsletter that explores mindfulness with you. Twice a week, I send you inspirational ideas to become a more mindful person in a world that can’t take a break.
You can read the web version here.
Stoicism is a 2000 years old philosophy. It is based on three main principles, and one of them is only focusing on the things that are under our control.
Next time you fail or you just feel stressed about something; ask yourself- is it really under your control?
Anything that involves someone’s opinion, luck, or will, isn’t worth your time. The only things you control are our thoughts and actions.
Focus on the process, not the outcome. The process is what you have control over, the outcome is often a blend of your effort and luck.
Usually, your emotions are outside of your control. What matters is how you handle them.
However, it’s easier said than done. It takes practice.
Some examples of the things outside of your control:
Opinion of others about you or your work.
When someone rejects you. Example: a job application. Employing you or not is under their control. You should focus on your CV, Cover Letter, or interview performance. Stress about making your application the best quality possible, not about the employer’s choice.
Let’s say you are a YouTuber. Focus on the content you put out, concentrate on the consistency or quality. It’s platform’s job to distribute your work and handle the performance.
You can’t control an inevitable change. (You can control climate change, so please do something).
You can’t control your past, so just leave it as it is. Accept your past mistakes and move on. These mistakes helped you become a better person.
Your appearance.
Buying bitcoin in 2010.
I stress out a lot about the things I can’t control. But it really helps when I analyze my mood and remember this rule. Be kind to others and remind them of this when you notice the overthinking.
Don’t put expectations on something you can’t control. There is a big chance that things won’t live up to your expectations. And if they do, remember that it wasn’t under your control in the first place.
This principle gives you the peace of mind you deserve. Once you understand that thinking so much about something you can’t influence is pointless , you get relief to think more clearly and move on with your life.
Outside My Control
Vast majority of my emotions & feelings
Vast majority of my thoughts
Vast majority of my sensations
My memories
Whether or not I achieve my goals
How good I feel when doing what I do
What other people say and do
How others perceive my motivations
How others judge or perceive me
What happens in the future
What happened in the past
Inevitable painful losses in life
Whether or not life gives me what I want
The inevitability of ageing, illness, and injury
Within My Control (Potentially)
How I respond to my emotions & feelings
How I respond to my thoughts
How I respond to my sensations
How I respond to my memories
How much action I take towards my goals
How much I focus on & engage in what I do
What I say and do to influence other people
How much I use my values for motivation
Whether or not I act like the sort of person I want to be
What I say and do to influence the future
How I respond to thoughts about the past
Being self-compassionate when losses occur
The values I live by, whether or not life gives me what I want
How I take care of and look after myself
Thanks for reading, have a great weekend!
If you enjoyed this edition, please consider letting me know by hitting the like button below!
👇