Is Your Next Decision a Mimetic Urge?
This ancient Greek concept is your path to authentic decision-making #50
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We are not direct or autonomous in our decisions. As social animals, we think in a complicated net of desires and influences. The decisions you make are not made in isolation and some of your desires may come from outside. That’s what Plato and Aristotle called Mimesis: our desire to imitate others.
First, this concept was mainly relevant to art, which tries to imitate real life. A painting imitating a real tree, or an actor imitating real emotions. Similarly, the concept could also be applied to our lives, resulting in an explanation of how we actually reason and make decisions.
When we apply the concept of Mimesis to our real lives, we discover something interesting. Turns out, we might not always know if we actually desire something out of personal choice and necessity, or just because your coworker Jack got the same thing.
You already know how your new car is not just a tool to get you from point A to B, but can also be a status symbol. When we look deeper, this is not the only decision that Jack unwillingly manipulated you into making.
So let’s solve this problem. Are you doing something because you want to? or because everyone else around you seems to be doing it, so you must do it too?
Probably the most important triangle you need to know
French philosopher René Girard contributed greatly to our understanding of the psychology of desire. He believed that imitation is the fundamental mechanism of human behaviour.
He introduced an interesting idea: people don’t fight over their differences, but they fight because they are the same. And want whatever will earn others' envy. With the freedom of choice for humans, comes the uncertainty about what to choose, so we consciously or unconsciously turn to others for these decisions. Humans can desire anything, as long as other humans desire it too.
Building on this idea, Girard introduced the triangle of mimetic desire:
Because desires are naturally different from needs, we can survive without them, they are not wired in our brains. We just don’t know which object to choose and even if we actually need it, the object may appear in our heads because of a mediator - a model we look up to and assume that we also need whatever they have.
Why we imitate
Imitating others seems like a natural thing for us to do. The social learning theory in social psychology studies just that. We imitate our parents and siblings to learn to speak, walk, eat, show emotions. Our behaviours can be similar to our parents because we’ve spent years imitating them automatically. Observational learning seems to be a big part of our lives, and not only in childhood.
Mimesis is similar to this theory. We have a role model that we try to imitate, observing their actions, achievements and possessions, often unconsciously. This leads to mimetic desires that stem from that observation. Our own decisions start to be influenced by external factors.
“Man is the creature who does not know what to desire, and he turns to others in order to make up his mind. We desire what others desire because we imitate their desires.”
— René Girard
Mimesis in the modern world
Mimetic desire is likely one of the main reasons why luxury products are still in business. We are not rational beings who think in isolation, we commonly rely on others to guide us through those decisions.
The concept of mimetic desire is clearly represented in modern advertising. A clothing company with a target demographic of younger people will include younger people in their promotional videos, targeting the ideal customer for them. This simple tactic works with our psychology: I see a guy who looks like me happy with that product = I want that product more. I see a celebrity looking fancy with a watch on their wrist = I want to look that successful too.
In a modern world of consumerism, understanding mimetic desires is vital if you want to actually be in control of your mind, be authentic, and be self-aware. Conscious consumption is an important skill in our world cluttered with fast dopamine traps.
Mimesis has been amplified through social media. Now instead of comparing yourself to your siblings, a tribe, or coworkers, you can do that with any person in the world. There are endless models out there who can fit into our triangles of mimetic desire.
Another side effect of mimetic desires could be competition or envy. If we don’t control this, our relationships may be affected and become less genuine. If left unattended, mimetic desires could transform healthy interactions into competitive spaces.
Something that can also become less genuine is our goals. What if mimetic desires shift from things to life goals? Our life decisions may be affected by the triangle of mimetic desire. Social pressure may force you to become an investment banker because you see rich finance bros every day on the street, making them your potential role models who you will try to unconsciously imitate.
My mimesis and what we can do about it
I am sure I’ve fallen into the trap of mimetic desires before. Others dictated a lot of decisions in my life. Sometimes I try to rebel. I chose an unpopular course in a university (Philosophy) and now every conversation about my studies becomes a brainstorm on how I will get a job. I took a long shot, I thought that if the majority of people are working on a job they didn’t study for, then what’s the point in predicting who I’m gonna be in 6 years? I chose a broad course that I am interested in, and the fact that nobody else in my social circle did that, makes me think that maybe my choice wasn’t entirely based of off social pressure. Or maybe rebelling against social pressure is also a mimetic desire? Was this also a social, rather than a personal decision?
I don’t know, but my point is that I actively try to evaluate my decisions on the basis of how mainstream my decision is. If it is, then maybe I am following the crowd aimlessly. If it’s not, then it could be that I made that decision more independently, or I am just following another, smaller crowd aimlessly too. For example, this kind of thinking could also be applied to me becoming the only vegan in my social circle. But again, I may be different from my immediate social group, but I am still following the vegan group or a philosophy students group that is out there somewhere, even if I don’t interact with them in real life. My decision to go to Uni is also kind of mainstream in itself, so this problem has multiple levels that will need to be uncovered.
I think values are extremely important here. If you don’t have a solid foundation of your identity, you will be easy to manipulate and you will stray from your path. If you have a concrete understanding of your desire, then the influences of other people are much less likely to get to you because you know what your priorities are. Simple example: why would I be tempted to buy a car after my coworker did if I believe in the supremacy of bicycles? That will not influence me at all because I know who I am and what I want.
However, rejecting mainstream is a simplistic way to approach the elimination of mimetic desires. The mainstream can motivate you to be better at something, pick up new hobbies, or work on yourself. What is dangerous is when this crosses a line and the mainstream starts to dictate your desires and fails to account for individual growth. It’s a tricky balance: knowing when to follow the crowd and when to forge our own way.
I like how the mission of That’s Philosophical directly ties in with mimetic desires. Taking a break from the world cluttered with desires, and stopping to reflect is why I started this publication.
Final Thoughts
We all have them. And mimetic desires are critical to be aware of.
Our social interactions deeply influence how we think and make decisions. These decisions can be minor or can be life-defining. Understanding mimetic desires is a vital part of becoming more self-aware.
Since it’s really hard and probably impossible to completely eliminate external factors. Just understanding them is a good step to limit their influence on your life. I encourage you to find a balance between being inspired by others and staying true to yourself.
Self-reflect. Embrace your authenticity and individuality. Pursue paths that genuinely resonate with your values.
The journey to managing mimetic urges is ongoing. This is an opportunity for self-reflection and a better understanding of yourself.
This action-based course is perfect for a That’s Philosophical reader.
Do you want to take action on your personal growth journey without theory overwhelm? Do you tire of woo woo and bro science approaches or find yourself lacking the support of like-minded peers on your journey? Book a free coaching session with Revolutionary Character's founder to experience first hand how this program can massively accelerate your growth! Should you decide to join the program, you will receive a 10% discount exclusive to readers of That's Philosophical.
Special thanks to Jacob Huber for assistance in crafting this edition of That’s Philosophical. Thanks for reading, see you next week!
Hello there, nice to have you back. I am exploring a Toltec practice called ‘not doing’ which encourages us to break habits/patterns by doing the opposite of what we normally do. My first one is to stop doom scrolling on my phone. I am on retreat for the all of December and I can really feel the withdrawal symptoms - what might I miss!. So I wonder what mimetic presssure I am at affect of. Great inquiry - much appreciation to you. Ann
As you say, we've likely all had our share of inauthentic desires derived from other people and from social expectations. It's important to be aware of it and recognize the buttons that are being pushed, as in advertising that attempts to subtly convince people that if you buy product x, you too will arrive at beautiful destination y.
It's a crock of course, but apparently an effective one. It's good to see folks like yourself advocating for a different path. Thanks for the article!